Making Feedback Matter
Feedback is one of the most useful tools in leadership, but it only drives change if leaders act on it. Being open to input is a start; following through on it is what builds credibility. When people see that their feedback is heard and applied, they are more likely to stay engaged, speak up, and invest in their work. When feedback is ignored or handled defensively, people disengage quickly. Opportunities to grow are missed, and team communication suffers.
A leader who applies feedback consistently, especially when it challenges their assumptions, sends a message that growth matters more than ego. They focus on getting better, not proving they were already right. This kind of leadership sets the tone for everyone else, showing that feedback is not a threat, but a tool. It is how we move forward.
This session focuses on the discipline of following through. You will reflect on how you respond to feedback, explore where ego might be getting in the way, and learn how to respond clearly, consistently, and without defensiveness.
“Feedback is a gift. Ideas are the currency of our next success. Let people see you value both feedback and ideas.”
Self-Assessment:
Making Feedback Matter
Please take a few moments to contemplate the following self-reflection questions. Where can you identify opportunities for personal growth in your leadership approach?
1. When someone gives me feedback, do I take time to reflect or move on quickly?
2. If I disagree with feedback, do I try to understand the other person’s perspective or focus on defending my own?
3. How often do I ask for feedback proactively?
4. Do I take steps to apply feedback, or do I acknowledge it without making changes?
5. When I’ve made changes, do I follow up and communicate what I’ve improved?
6. Have I ever dismissed or resisted feedback that made me uncomfortable, even if it was helpful?
7. When feedback challenges how I see myself, do I pause to consider what’s true, or do I move on without exploring the discomfort?
8. Do I model openness to feedback for others, or do I expect it more than I give it?
Remember, this self-assessment is just a starting point for understanding your knowledge of Making Feedback Matter as a leader. It's essential to reflect on your responses and actively work on areas where improvement is needed. Additionally, seeking feedback from others and working with your ECFL Leadership Coach can provide valuable insights into your strengths and areas for improvement.
Feedback is often uncomfortable because it shines a light on things we may not want to see. That feeling isn’t something to avoid; it’s something to explore. The most effective leaders do not wait until the moment feels easy or safe. They lean into the discomfort, seek out honest input, listen with focus, and respond with intention.
What separates growth from stagnation is not how smoothly someone reacts in the moment, but whether they take the next step. When feedback is treated as useful insight rather than a personal judgment, it builds trust and sends a clear message: improvement matters more than image. Not every piece of input will be accurate or relevant. But the first instinct should be to understand, not to defend or dismiss.
Many people hear feedback and move on, assuming awareness is enough. But what changes someone’s impact isn’t the moment they heard it, it’s what they did after. That step—turning a note into a choice, and a choice into a habit—is where leadership starts to evolve.
You don’t need sweeping change to show growth. Often, the most noticeable shifts in leadership come from small, deliberate adjustments that are applied consistently and revisited over time. Feedback that sticks usually looks simple on the surface, but behind it is a decision to keep learning.
“Feedback is the breakfast of champions.”
It helps to recognize the most common reasons leaders struggle with feedback:
They believe awareness is enough. Just knowing something needs to change doesn’t mean it will.
They assume the feedback doesn’t apply. Without reflection, it’s easy to dismiss a point that doesn’t match your self-image.
They get stuck in discomfort. Defensiveness, shame, or fear of being wrong can block progress.
They don’t follow up. Feedback is given, but the loop never closes. The person who shared it sees no change, and trust weakens.
Strong leaders return to the feedback they receive. They reflect, they make meaningful changes, and they continue the conversation. But even the most well-intended leaders can struggle to follow through if ego gets in the way, especially when the feedback challenges how they see themselves or how they’ve always done the work.
Ego tends emerge unexpectedly, and often at the worst times. It can sound like a quick explanation, a subtle dismissal, or the decision to avoid a conversation that might feel uncomfortable. Over time, it keeps leaders stuck in familiar patterns, focused more on protecting how they are seen than improving how they lead.
What makes ego especially difficult to work around is that it often hides behind confidence or competence. Leaders who care deeply about doing good work may still resist feedback if it challenges how they see themselves. Rather than slowing down to consider a new perspective, they may feel the urge to explain, defend, or prove they already have it covered.
That resistance is rarely about the feedback itself. Most of the time, it comes from fear. Maybe it’s the fear of being wrong, of losing credibility, or of being seen as less capable. And yet the leaders who grow the most are the ones who stop fighting that discomfort and using it as motivation.
Leaders who manage their ego create an environment where:
People feel comfortable sharing their ideas and perspectives
Input is viewed as an opportunity rather than a challenge to authority
Mistakes are used as learning experiences instead of sources of blame
It will take both the self-awareness to recognize when ego is influencing your behavior and the intentional effort to actively choose a different response. One way to start building that awareness is by paying attention to how you respond in everyday moments.
Daily Ego Check-In
One way to stay mindful of ego is to do a quick check-in at the end of each day or week. This simple practice helps you track patterns in your reactions and identify areas where you might need to shift your mindset. To help you track and apply feedback in a structured way, use this downloadable Feedback Tracker.
Ask yourself:
Did I feel defensive at any point today? What triggered that reaction?
Was I more focused on proving I was right than on listening?
Did I dismiss an idea too quickly? What would have happened if I had explored it further?
Did I resist admitting a mistake or adjusting my approach?
Was there a moment where I chose curiosity over defensiveness? What was the result?
Journaling these answers or reflecting on them regularly helps leaders identify where ego is showing up.
“In a growth mindset, challenges are exciting rather than threatening. So rather than thinking, ‘Oh, I’m going to reveal my weaknesses,’ you say, ‘Wow, here’s a chance to grow.’”
When feedback is handled well, it becomes one of the most effective leadership tools.
Below are a few ways to follow through with feedback in ways that build credibility and momentum:
Clarify What the Feedback Really Means: Don’t move forward on assumptions. Before you act on feedback, take time to understand what is actually being asked of you. Vague input creates vague improvement. Ask for an example, rephrase it back, or check in to make sure your interpretation is correct.
Break It Down, Then Follow Through: Feedback doesn’t need to be implemented all at once. Identify a few clear actions you can take and begin with the most manageable. Small changes, done consistently, show progress and keep you from getting overwhelmed.
Close the Loop: Circle back. Let the person who gave you feedback know what you’ve done with it. This doesn’t mean over-explaining, but instead acknowledging their input and showing that you took it seriously. It also creates space for additional clarity or continued conversation.
Show That Feedback Changes Behavior: Nothing builds credibility faster than visible changes. When people see you adjust your approach based on their input, they’re more likely to stay engaged, offer ideas, and trust your leadership.
Reflect Before You React: If your first instinct is to justify or explain, pause. Ask yourself whether the response is driven by ego, discomfort, or fear of being misunderstood. A short pause is often the difference between growth and resistance.
Putting feedback into practice takes discipline and a willingness to rethink your habits. Hearing what others think may not always feel good, but it will always be useful. The goal is not to agree with every word; it is to stay open long enough to understand what might be true, make a change where it matters, and show others what real improvement looks like.
Rather than treating feedback as another item on a long list, consider what it’s meant to change. Think about not only how you want to lead others, but how you want to lead yourself.
Reflection Questions:
What’s one piece of feedback I’ve received recently that I haven’t acted on yet?
What would follow-through on that feedback actually look like?
Who can I ask for input on how I’m doing?
What feedback habit do I want to strengthen in the next month?
Elevate your understanding of Making Feedback Matter by taking flight with the following resources. Use this opportunity to navigate, uncover, and expand the horizons of your leadership influence.
Minute With Maxwell: Being Coachable - John Maxwell (3:13)
Why The Best Leaders Let Themselves Be Vulnerable With Others
The Power Of Feedback: A Catalyst For Growth In Leadership And Employee Development