Know When to Speak Up
Every yes has a cost. That’s one of the easiest things to forget in the middle of a busy workday. In an office like Morgan County Probate, it can feel like we’re supposed to say yes to every request, every question, every extra task that comes our way. And while saying yes can be helpful, it also takes time, focus, and energy. If we say yes too often or without thinking it through, we start to lose track of what we actually need to be doing.
Rather than shutting people out, boundaries give you the clarity and space to stay present and effective where it counts. They help us focus on what is important, stay steady when things get busy, and make sure we do not burn out trying to be everywhere at once.
When we don’t set boundaries, we end up reacting instead of responding. We overcommit. We try to do everything and make everyone happy. But over time, that leaves us tired, distracted, and spread too thin. Clear boundaries give us space to think. They help us speak up when it counts and step back when we need to.
This session is about learning to protect your time and attention. It’s about knowing when to speak up, how to communicate your needs with clarity, and how to make decisions that reflect what matters most.
Self-Assessment: Know When to Speak Up
Please take a few moments to answer the following self-reflection questions. Where can you identify opportunities for growth in your leadership and daily life?
What matters most in this season of my work and life?
Am I protecting that with how I spend my time and energy?
What do I regularly say yes to that is no longer helpful?
Where in my week do I feel most overextended?
How comfortable am I saying no?
What makes it difficult to protect my limits?
When was the last time I felt fully present and focused?
What needs to change to protect that kind of focus more often?
This self-assessment serves as a starting point in understanding your current Work/Life Balance. Taking time to reflect on your answers and focusing on areas for growth will support your development.
“Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to make a life.”
There is a common idea that strong leadership means saying yes to everything and being available all the time. But that kind of constant access does not lead to productivity or strong decisions. It leads to burnout. Real leadership means showing up with focus and being present where it counts, and boundaries are what help make that possible. Boundaries help protect your time, your energy, and the quality of your work, so you can stay focused on what matters most.
Let’s look at a familiar scenario:
You check your schedule and realize you’ve agreed to three new requests this week. None of them are emergencies. None of them align with your main priorities. But you said yes anyway.
Now, your focus time is gone. You feel rushed and frustrated. You try to push through, but you are distracted and exhausted.
Then you pause. You ask, “What matters most right now?” You realize that your priorities have been set aside in order to meet every request. Not because you had to, but because you didn’t stop to weigh the cost of each yes.
Use that moment of realization as a turning point. Start small. Begin checking in with yourself before saying yes. Speak up when your plate is full. Build boundaries that protect your focus and your energy, so you can show up with purpose, not under pressure.
“Fight for the things that you care about, but do it in a way that will lead others to join you.”
Here are three things to keep in mind as you practice speaking up and setting boundaries:
Respond instead of reacting. Don’t let emotions or stress decide your next move. Give yourself just a moment to breathe before answering a request, replying to frustration, or reacting to stress. A short pause can help you lead from calm instead of impulse.
Keep the issue the issue. Stay grounded and don’t let your reaction become the distraction. If something needs to be addressed, stay focused on the actual concern. Don’t let tone, timing, or frustration become the center of the conversation. The clearer you are, the more likely you’ll be heard.
Focus on what you can control. You can’t control how someone reacts. But you can control how you show up, what you say, and how you handle the moment afterward. Speak with honesty and let the rest be what it is.
It is not always easy to say no or to speak up when something is not working. Here are some best practices to help you figure out what matters most and when to use your voice with clarity and purpose. Remember, speaking up well means being thoughtful about what you say and when, why, and how you say it.
Know Why You’re Speaking Up: Before you bring something up, ask yourself what your goal is. Are you trying to fix a problem? Offer support? Ask for space? Being clear on your purpose helps you stay grounded and keeps the conversation focused.
Keep Your Delivery Steady: The message matters, but so does the way you say it. Speak calmly, clearly, and with enough space for someone to hear you. Rushing or raising your voice can shift the focus away from the issue itself.
Learn the Language of a Respectful No: Saying no doesn’t have to be negative. Try simple phrases like “I don’t have the bandwidth for that right now” or “That’s not something I can take on this week.” You don’t need a long explanation. Be kind and clear.
Choose Words That Keep The Conversation Open: You don’t have to soften the truth, but how you say it can make a big difference. Try using language that explains how the issue affects you or your work, instead of blaming or accusing. That shift can lead to a much more productive conversation.
Protect Your Decision-Making Energy: Every choice costs mental energy, even the small ones. When your priorities and boundaries aren’t clear, you end up reevaluating everything, which leads to fatigue. It’s the same feeling you get after making decisions all day, only to feel stuck on something simple like what to eat for dinner.
Strong leadership is not built on endless yeses. It is shaped by clarity, intention, and the discipline to protect what matters. The way you speak up and the limits you hold reflect what you value and help define the kind of leader you are.
Reflection Questions:
What matters most in this season of my leadership? Am I protecting it with my time and energy?
What is something I keep saying yes to that is no longer serving me?
Where in my schedule do I need to re-establish boundaries?
How comfortable am I saying no? What makes it difficult, and how could I approach it differently?
Do I have regular time set aside to think, plan, or reflect… or am I always in motion?
Expand your understanding of Knowing When to Speak Up with the following resources. Use this opportunity to refine your leadership skills and navigate challenges with the care and professionalism that define The MCPO Way.
Working Well: Saying no is hard, but setting boundaries can improve your health